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Fortune Cookies

The very first time I had a fortune cookie, was on a visit to the USA in 1996. We had a meal in a Chinese Restaurant in a little town in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania and they were served with the coffee .

The second time was last night. Whilst wife and daughter no 1 went to see Muse at the SECC in Glasgow. Daughter no 2, having done well in a maths test at school was entitled to a treat too (neither she nor I are fans of Muse) so we went to the local Chinese Restaurant.

So, here is my destiny.

Of course from my educated position I could never believe in such things. I mean, how could a random message inside a sweet confection have any bearing on events?

I came out of the restaurant thinking “things could be looking up!”


Meanwhile in the USA

My daughter sends me this and doesn’t reckon the ice cream sounds too appetising:

On at least two levels!

English diet could save lives in rest of UK

According to this report from the BBC.

Personally I’m all for it. Many of my contemporaries will remember the staple diet of one of our boyhood heroes:

Off the scale….

I first wrote about the Scoville scale in a posting here in April. The Trinidad Scorpion Butch T I wrote about then had a Scoville scale rating of 1.38 million.

To put this in some kind of perspective there is a chilli extract called Satan’s Blood which registers at 800,000.

Police grade pepper spray clocks in at 5,300,000.

And yet there are commercially available chilli extracts which register at up to 16,000,000 on Scoville. It carries the warning “Should you actually attempt to make use of this product EXERCISE EXTREME CAUTION! This is not a sauce! Avoid any and all skin contact!”

Of course Glasgow has sometimes been called the curry capital of the world but across in the capital Edinburgh they seem to like their curries hot.

There were two people rushed to hospital the other day whilst sampling the Kismot Killer Curry

These days, about as spicy as I try is the delicious South Indian garlic chilli chicken from out local curry house. It is in fact so mild that you can clearly taste the garlic!

I remember back in the day though being a hot curry enthusiast myself. When I say hot, I mean a vindaloo. I was never adventurous enough to try the even hotter traditional curries tindaloo or phaal.

About twenty years ago I recall going into a Glasgow curry restaurant with our then next door neighbours. John ordered a phaal chicken curry.

The conversation went something like:

“Are you SURE sir? the phaal curry is not for the faint hearted”

“Aye sure! bring it on!”

“Sir our chef will gladly cook you a phaal curry, but I must warn you that we only serve maybe six of this dish in a year. I have never seen anyone eat the whole meal.”

“I’ll finish it, no problem”

“If it is your wish sir. I would however recommend a large jug of iced water”

When they brought the curry to the table, and the steam wafted upwards, our eyes literally stung.

John looked at the dish and said “Here goes” and stuffed a generous fork full of the toxic concoction into his mouth. I swear the sauce had a green tinge to it and maybe it was my imagination but it seemed to be bubbling!

What followed was something akin to this:

That is, except for the “pass the chilli” instruction at the end.

The last words John spoke that night were “I can’t eat that”. When I say spoke, I mean that wide mouthed whisper people do when they are suffering some kind of trauma or shock.

He spent the rest of the evening with a fixed stare on his face. He wasn’t right for two days.

I’ve just checked to find that phaal curries are typically 400,000 to 600,000 on Scoville.

I’m just away to order a bottle of Satan’s Blood.

Horse D’Oevres

My old friend, and occasional correspondent here, Glade Rover, forwards this photo sent to him by his brother who lives in Thailand; He had noticed a rather interesting item on a menu:

Half a kilo! quite a bargain eh?

I’m beginning to wonder if this is the secret ingredient in Morrisons Value Curry Sauce!


This is a jar of Morrisons Value Curry Sauce.

Its ingredients are tomato purée, onion, sultanas, sugar, curry powder, coriander, tumeric, fenugreek, cumin, mustard, ginger, pepper, paprika, chilli and nutmeg amongst others.

Your challenge, without checking is to tell me just how much value is in this curry sauce?

How much for a 440g jar?

Stout and Saucy

From the HP Sauce Website

HP Guinness Sauce is delicious rich, tangy and spicy sauce made with the highest quality ingredients. Combining the strong and smooth taste of Guinness with the distinctive flavour of HP, we bring you the ultimate sauce adventure. Complements perfectly sausages and red meat dishes, it’s a taste everyone will love! HP Guinness brings food to life!.

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