• March 2013
    M T W T F S S
  • Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

    Join 285 other followers

  • Archives

  • Categories

  • Recent Posts

  • Reviewers’ Comments

    "Great read every day. Makes me smile as Rab muses about music and his irreverent views on the EU. Tune in, you won't be disappointed."

    "Excellent 'Blog' which can be controversial at times, while maintaining it's humour. Keep it up Big Rab!"

    "Updated every day with doses of good humour, political satire, a running commentary on the progress of author's home football team and his life."

    "Pure brilliant, so it is - I never miss it, though God knows, I've tried."

    "An inspiration to start my own blog"

    "For dipping into it's better than pakora sauce"

    "Anyone who doesn't like the EU and has a soft spot for Albion Rovers can't be all bad"

    "Facile and False"

    "Populist,puerile and prosaic"

    "Utter pish! Keep it up, I love it!"

    "People may also find the Ben Lomond Free Press blog illuminating, interesting and/or amusing. It’s not mentalist as such but familiar themes emerge. I particularly like accounts of encounters with strange elementals (of course! ELEmentals!) from elfin safety. And the fact that the blog is run by someone who plays in a blues band called Harmonica Lewinsky."

  • Hit Me!

    • 1,399,169 hits since January 2008
  • Top Rated

Ah cannae get the matches tae light!

It was a quote from a TV advert in the 1980s for Scottish Bluebell matches where a hapless Scots soldier is trying to get a cannon to fire on the battlefield. The answer is “Ya dunderheid (non complimentary Scots term for a numpty) Ah telt ye, ye should have used Scottish Bluebell!”

I searched Youtube to see if the ad was there but sadly nae luck.

I thought it would sum up perfectly the current hapless efforts of our international football team.

To be fair, at the time of that ad, the Scotland team was full of international class players from the likes of Liverpool,Arsenal and Manchester United as well as some from the Old Firm and Scotland’s top sides of the time, Aberdeen and Dundee United.

Now we’re relying on guys from Hull City and Blackburn Rovers.

Strachan must be wondering what he’s done taking on the job.

Anyway, before I get too maudlin about that, check out this series of Scottish TV adverts from 1985 which I found on my unsuccessful search. The quality isn’t all that good but have a look at the Ricky Fulton/Gordon Kennedy McEwans Lager ad and also the ones for William Lows and the Briggait (Closed Tuesday).

5 Responses

  1. The ad you might be thinking of was shot in 1977 at Doune castle. I happened to be visiting and was invited to participate as an extra.
    In it, a compliment of Redcoats were attacking the castle and the Scottish commander asked “Jimmy” to “hurry up with the boiling oil”.
    Jimmy responded with the phrase you referenced.
    I have a copy of the ad supplied to me by the advertising company some time ago.
    Terry Nelson
    Dover, New Hampshire, USA

    • I was a 4 year old boy watching them film the advert. I would do anything to get hold of a copy. It was one of the last times I got with my Gran & Grandfather together.

  2. I to was an extra in this advert and have been trying for years to find footage of it. I think it would have been around about the mid seventies and it was indeed filmed at Doune Castle, I was a Red coat and was given a musket to fire. I recall being paid fifteen pounds for the day and I was also given five pounds for my trainers which had to be painted black.
    There were a few notable characters from the village who took part, sadly some are no longer with us.
    If anyone comes across any footage please let me know.

    • I was a 4 year old boy watching them film the advert. I would do anything to get hold of a copy. It was one of the last times I got with my Gran & Grandfather together.

  3. I am certain I remember a Scottish Bluebell advert consisting of two hapless plaid swaddled bravehearts battling with sword and targe for reasons unknown in a sodden field somewhere, and one was shouting at an equally hapless drookit wummin elsewhere in the sodden field to hurry up wi the fire. I think her name was Morag, and it was her that said “ah cannae get the matches tae light”.
    I remember her voice quite clearly. For some reason I’m reminded of Olive from On the Buses…

    I’d love to see these ads.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: