As regular readers know, my part time job outside blogging is as owner/manager of a Pet Store. It’s been not a bad journey these 27 years but some days, like I suppose any job can affect anyone, it sucks.
Yesterday was such a day. There are several things which are absolutely guaranteed to send me into grumpy old man mode. Number one is unruly wild children whose parents seem to suffer from 1) Blindness 2) Deafness and 3) Complete lack of parental responsibility.
One such family with three little cherubs was in yesterday. “Mammy mammy!” screamed a wee boy at approximately the decibel level of the loudest chainsaw you’ve ever heard, as he simultaneously shoulder charged an aquarium, “Look at that mad wee fish!”. His two sisters had positioned themselves behind the counter mixing various loose foods to their own recipe.
The mother, with grubby hands, had her head buried in one of our books (obviously under the impression that the shop is in fact a library) as the faither who was probably the most glaikit individual I’ve seen in some time, managed to inquire, despite having a mouth full of Greggs sausage roll “Huv yez no’ goat any cheaper dog leads?”
“Than £1.50 sir?… eh no”
Meanwhile the two sisters had progressed to the dog toy display area where they proceeded to systematically pick up each toy and return it to a different location. In between times they would (presumably for quality control purposes) press each one to make it squeak.
SQUEAAAAAAAK! SQUEEEEEAAAAAAAAAK! sqeak squeak!
“Mammmy! Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmy! AH WAAAANT A RABBIT” yelled the boy, the decibel level has now reached that of the take off of a Jumbo Jet
“Mammmy! Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmy! AH WAAAANT A RAAAAABBIT”
“Mammmy! Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmy! AH WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANT A RAAAAAAAAAAABBIT”
Mammy is blissfully eating a Greggs steak bake, carefully dropping bits of it into the book as the wee boy by this time has ruptured the eardrums of everyone within twenty yards.
The girls are running around the shop yelling like banshees.
The only consolation I can find is that I will never have to visit their house.
The next “pet hate” is the customer who comes in for advice and insists after each question on interrupting you as you attempt to answer.
“Ma fish tank’s durty -how?”
“Is the filter broke?”
“Whit kind of fish can ah keep in wi they wans?”
“How much is that tank?”
“How many fish could I keep in that?”
This is a common occurrence and one which I’m increasingly in danger of one day framing my response as……
“Look! wil you SHUT the F*** UP and LISTEN!!! Don’t ask me a question if you have no intention of listening to the answer!!!”
Did I mention about people who seem completely unable to stand up unaided without sprawling themselves over the counter as they talk to you?
Maybe I can leave that for another day.
Filed under: Pet Matters | Tagged: completely unreasonable inconsiderate fools and idiots (and their children) | 13 Comments »