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The Best McClaren Joke So Far.

Yes the jokes are coming thick and fast. England are to change the three lions to three tampons because they're going through their worst ever period etc. etc. I particularly like the one on the left here. Before any of my English friends (and relatives – in -law!) start complaining, may I say that nearly all of these jokes originate south of the border!

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Irony R.I.P

Following on this week's story that two cd roms containing the personal details of 25,000,000 child benefit claimants are missing, Chancellor Alistair Darling is to appear with Kirsty Young on Radio 4 tomorrow.

The programme? DESERT ISLAND DISCS!

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Scots Die Laughing

 

Thank you to Scott who posted a link to this article from "The Daily Mash". It was so good I've cut and pasted it!

 

SCOTLAND DIES LAUGHING Print E-mail

TRIBUTES are being paid to Scotland this morning after the entire country laughed itself to death.

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Most would have been dead within minutes

The alarm was first raised at around 10pm last night as thousands of phone calls and text messages went unanswered.

Small groups of volunteers from Berwick-Upon-Tweed and Carlisle ventured north just after midnight only to find houses full of dead people gathered around still blaring television sets.

By dawn, as RAF helicopters flew over deserted city streets, it was clear that the whole country had suffered a catastrophic abdominal rupture.

Wayne Hayes, a special constable from Northumberland, said: "We went into one house in Dunbar and found three men sitting on the sofa with huge smiles on their faces, still holding cans of 70 shilling. They seemed to be at peace."

He added: "In a house near Edinburgh we found a man face down on the living room floor with his trousers and pants round his knees.

"It seems he may have been showing his bare buttocks to the television when he keeled over."

Roy Hobbs, a civil engineer from Northampton, said: "I got a call from my friend Ian in Stirling at about 9.50pm.

"He was already laughing when I answered the phone, but after about 25 minutes of the most vigorous and uncontrollable hilarity, everything suddenly went very quiet."

Moving tributes are already being placed along the Scotland-England border with many mourners opting to leave a simple bag of chips or a deep fried bunch of flowers.

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