Then

Now

Stripped of his soubriquet, de-knighted and down and out on thirteen grand a week.

About three years ago I wrote this wee crochety jingle for him (thanks to the Kinks for the tune!)

Dedicated Follower of Money

I’ll bet Lord Archole of Weston Super Mare is relieved that unlike Freddie and Robert Mugabe, he didn’t do anything to bring the honours system into disrepute.

I saw this quote on the BBC:

IoD director general Simon Walker told the BBC he did not approve of the decision, given Mr Goodwin had not been convicted of crime.

“To do it because… you don’t approve of someone, you think they have done things that are wrong but actually there is no criminality… is inappropriate and politicises the whole honours system,” he said.

Ooh! it looks like it has to be its first outing of 2012!

Address To A Haggis

Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the puddin-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o’ a grace
As lang’s my arm.

The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hurdies like a distant hill,
Your pin wad help to mend a mill
In time o’ need,
While thro’ your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead.

His knife see rustic Labour dight,
An’ cut you up wi’ ready sleight,
Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
Like ony ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reekin, rich!

Then, horn for horn,
they stretch an’ strive:
Deil tak the hindmost! on they drive,
Till a’ their weel-swall’d kytes belyve,
Are bent lyke drums;
Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
“Bethankit!” ‘hums.

Is there that owre his French ragout
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricassee wad mak her spew
Wi’ perfect scunner,
Looks down wi’ sneering, scornfu’ view
On sic a dinner?

Poor devil! see him ower his trash,
As feckless as a wither’d rash,
His spindle shank, a guid whip-lash,
His nieve a nit;
Thro’ bloody flood or field to dash,
O how unfit!

But mark the Rustic, haggis fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread.
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He’ll mak it whissle;
An’ legs an’ arms, an’ heads will sned,
Like taps o’ thrissle.

Ye Pow’rs wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o’ fare,

Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggies;
But, if ye wish her gratefu’ prayer,
Gie her a haggis!

There’s a two fold reason for my publishing this. Number one was my seeing this fine cartoon published in the Telegraph a few days ago.

The other was just to record how much I like haggis!
There is an excellent information page on Burns and haggis here as well as a translation of the poem. It tells how haggis became an integral part of Burns suppers through that poem.

Two suppers down for me and two to go.

Here I am in action last Friday night.

Blogger does Burns - photo Bill Kean

]]> http://bigrab.wordpress.com/2012/01/31/a-matter-of-taste/feed/ 1 bigrab adams-cartoon rabbie http://bigrab.wordpress.com/2012/01/30/hester-rancid/ http://bigrab.wordpress.com/2012/01/30/hester-rancid/#comments Mon, 30 Jan 2012 07:28:52 +0000 bigrab http://bigrab.wordpress.com/?p=15135 ]]> I have no personal animus towards Stephen Hester.

However I do wonder what particular skill is required to re-structure a company by getting rid of 30,000 positions in it, thus qualifying for a near million pound bonus?

Perhaps being a complete bastard and having no conscience would assist in this regard?

Sir Fred Goodwin could have done it.

There will be a good few who could have done it for far less.

Hester though is not alone in being grossly overpaid.

There are company executives, top sports people, entertainers, media people and politicians raking it in.

I heard recently that Tony Blair “earns” £12.5 million annually.

His tax bill?

£300,000.

Anyway Mr Hester has had a good look in the mirror and examined his conscience bowed to media and political pressure and decided to waive his bonus.

When’s the revolution starting?

In fact she doesn’t think there’ll be any “lift” from “separation” and thinks “everything will go up”

My friend Almax mischievously suggests that “everything will go tits up” would be a more appropriate admonishment from Ms M and I agree that might be a good “strap” line.

D’you suppose when Dave was talking about panic in breasties he could have had Michelle in mind? (Oh stop it -ed)

It struck me that he reminded me of someone and it has just come to me who it is:

All devil as I am, a damned wretch,
A harden’d, stubborn, unrepenting villain,
Still my heart melts at human wretchedness;
And with sincere tho’ unavailing sighs
I view the helpless children of Distress.
With tears indignant I behold th’ Oppressor,
Rejoicing in the honest man’s destruction,
Whose unsubmitting heart was all his crime.

Even you, ye hapless crew, I pity you;
Ye, whom the Seeming good think sin to pity;
Ye poor, despis’d, abandon’d vagabonds,
Whom Vice, as usual, has turn’d o’er to Ruin.
O, but for kind, tho’ ill-requited,
I had been driven forth like you forlorn,
The most detested, worthless wretch among you!

O injured God! Thy goodness has endow’d me
With talents passing most of my compeers,
Which I in just proportion have abus’d;
As far surpassing other common villains
As Thou in natural parts hadst given me more.

The information at the Beeb site that I’ve linked to above, says the following on the poem:

“This poem is thought to have been written sometime during 1777 when Burns was at Mount Oliphant with his family.

The tone of the poem reflects the misery which the Burnes family endured on the farm during this time, and before the family managed to move to Lochlie later in the year.

The poem was first published in the Scots Magazine, November, 1803.

The opening lines are reminiscent of lines found in Thomas Otway’s play Venice Preserv’d: ‘Yes a most notorious Villain: / To see the suffring’s of my fellow Creatures, / and own my self a Man’. The poem is also notable because it demonstrates a keen awareness of Adam Smith’s Theory of Moral Sentiments (1759), which Burns had read early in his life.”

Written in 1777 eh?

That’ll be when the bard was eighteen then.

Crikey.

He has a great way with words and a sharp political insight. He has a rather good article published today about this week’s announcements on the referendum by Alex Salmond.

McWhirter like all journalists though sometimes fails with the crystal ball gazing. His take on the Eurozone financial crisis for instance proved to be somewhat less prescient than may have appeared at the time it was all fermenting in 2009/10.

This quote in today’s article may come back to haunt him:

“They had also expected a second “fall back” question on devolution max so that Salmond could have his cake and eat it. In the event, there was neither. The spin was that there was no spin, just Salmond’s 10 little words: “Do you agree that Scotland should be an independent country?”

Eck strikes me as a man who eats up any cake he can.

Voraciously.

And if there were ever a politician to spin better than any man with some poles and plates it is he. He is the very personification of a peerie (it’s a Scots word for a spinning top which may be derived from the similarity in shape of the object to a pear)

McWhirter is right in the main thrust of his article though. Salmond has left Cameron et al at the starting line. His (Cameron’s) response to Scots Tory MP (for Epping Forest) Eleanor Laing, demonstrated the level of his misunderstanding of the Scots cadence and pronunciation.

David, it is pronounced bree-stie to rhyme with beas-tie.

And if you haven’t already properly checked the meaning of ‘sleekit’, I’d recommend you do it post haste.

Oh aye, and if I were you I’d stick auld Michael Forsyth back in the box he’s been in for the last twenty years. Like he is going to advance the unionists’ case eh?

One more reason to dislike Stephen Hester.